Take Out
by 4TAE
Summary: Eren's milkshakes bring all the boys to his yard. (although he wasn't quite expecting his college professor)


written for #ereriweek on tumblr! yay. probably will be 3 or 4 chapters.

I haven't proofread this yet, so sorry for any errors.

* * *

Eren downright despised his French class. There were multiple reasons why, ranging from how Eren did not have the capacity to learn new languages, to his professor who never seemed to wake up from the right side of the bed, and of course, it was mostly because that Eren could never find a sense of peace during the lecture. He had long given up any hope of getting an A in this class, and at this point, even a passing grade of C sounded laughable.

Eren usually nabbed the seats at the very back of the lecture hall, so one might expect that it was relatively easy to sleep during the lecture or draw odd doodles at the edge of his papers. Perhaps it would have been easy to drift off into his own sea of thoughts, but…

"Psst. Yeager. Hey."

… but it was exactly this. Eren crossed his arms and used them as a pillow for his head, trying his best to ignore the annoying whispers and constant prodding from behind him. When the whispering didn't stop, Eren jerked back in his seat, swinging his elbow around with him and jabbing Jean's knee right at the his bony joint.

Satisfied by the pained hiss that escaped from Jean, Eren turned back around and pretended to pay attention to the lecture, knowing that Jean hated to be ignored.

"Fuck, Yeager, are you trying to put me into a wheelchair?"

Eren snorted. _If only_. "What, can't handle a bit of pain from a little nudge in the knee?"

Jean's eyes flashed angrily at Eren's, much to Eren's smugness. He relished the fact that he had managed to poke at Jean's pride, because the horseface simply had too much of it. Eren knew he really shouldn't be pushing this further, but Jean _did_ provoke him in the first place, so Eren supposed it was justified one way or another.

"Eren Yeager, you are a fucking asshole."

"Glad to know. Now kindly fuck off, Jean," Eren venomously hissed back, turning his head so that he was staring straight at the wall opposite of the horseface.

"What, no snotty comebacks this time?"

"Fuck. Off," Eren demanded with a tone of finality. "What part of 'leave me alone' do you not understand?"

"You're the one who made it a point to argue with me all the time, you asshole-" Jean suddenly broke off his heated accusation, and looked sideways, before directing at Eren the most infuriating expression that he had ever seen- the odd half-smile, half-sneer that resembled a drunk horse. Jean opened his mouth once again-

"Are you quite done yet?"

Eren immediately, and loudly shot back, "No I'm not - ugh, just do me a favor and _stuff your mouth with dicks_, _will you_?!"

But Jean didn't reply, and Eren realized too late that the lecture hall had gone deathly silent, that the icy tone of voice did not belong to Jean, and certainly realized too late that that there was a presence behind him.

"Mister… _Yeager_, I presume…" Professor Levi leveled Eren's fury with his own stony glare. He looked down at Eren, unflinching in his penetrating gaze. "Would you care to repeat what you just said?"

Eren wished that the ground would open up and swallow him whole.

* * *

Eren carelessly flung his bag onto the floor, plopping down directly next to it with a defeated sigh.

"Long day, Eren? You look beat."

Eren heaved another sigh and buried his face into his palms, peeking through his fingers to see the worried face of his friend. He had fled from the lecture hall as soon as the lecture was over so the professor didn't have the chance to ask him to stay after class. His heart wasn't ready for that kind of torture- he had heard all sorts of scary stories about his French Professor. "You have no idea," he groaned. He quickly muttered, "Jean provoked me, and I ended up in deep shit with Professor Levi- I told him to eat dicks! I'm gonna kill Jean- as soon as I see him again-"

"Woah, Eren, slow down!" Armin cut in. "I didn't catch any of that. Why exactly do you want to kill Jean?"

"Because." Eren slammed his fist down on the ground in despair. "He provoked me. And I ended up telling Professor Levi to stuff his mouth with dicks, Armin, and that's the last thing I need. A professor who hates my guts, who also teaches the class I'm currently _flunking_- oh god."

"Well-"

"And on top of that- Professor Levi assigned us a thirty page essay! _Thirty pages_! One-inch margins, no double spacing, size twelve font- thirty pages- this professor's got a stick up his ass, I swear! And it's due by next week, oh lord… this is definitely all my fault- no, it's _all that bastard Jean's fault_!" Eren bobbed back and forth in despair. "Armin, how will I survive?!"

The blonde sympathetically patted Eren's shoulder whilst wrestling on a cozy sweater and carefully locking his employee locker shut. "You'll do fine, Eren. Maybe you should calm down a little?"

"Calm down?! Armin! You know that I fucking suck at French! Hell, I don't even know why I signed up for this class- it's been half a year and all I know is _bonjour_, _escargot_, and _merci_!"

"And _croissant_, you know that too."

"Oh yeah, and _croissant_- Armin! You're not helping!" Eren frantically shook his head, erratically moving his hands in midair before slapping them down on the floor with grim determination. "Fuck this shitty class. You know what? I'll write a thirty page essay on why this damned language sucks, and be done with it."

"Eren…" The blond's head popped out of the sweater, and he glanced at the hysterical brunette. "I'll help you with the essay this weekend. For now, why don't you just get dressed and crank up the milkshake machine? The counter needs some help as well."

Eren paused, slowly looking up at Armin as if he had just saved the world from destruction with some otherworldly powers. In a voice filled with wonder, he gasped, "Armin, you're my hero- _je t'aime, mon __chéri_! What would I do without you?"

Armin blinked, then quickly frowned. "So you _do_ know more than four words in French! You better have not tricked me."

"Never!" Eren firmly declared, placing a fist over his chest with resolution, almost in a proud manner. "I would never lie about my horrible capacity to learn new languages!"

He wasn't lying at all. Eren grimaced, remembering how his mother had pestered him repeatedly for a month, complaining about his utter lack of knowledge of the world and common sense. And for some reason, Carla Yeager's solution was most simple- take a new language. When she brought it up, Eren had to bite his tongue to keep from snorting- exactly how would taking a new language widen his horizons and open up more potential?

If anything, it killed his potential, seeing he was probably going to flunk this class.

A part of Eren wanted to fail, to show his mother that she was wrong; yet, another part, the more studious, honest part of Eren wanted him to do his best. Honestly, he tried his best in class in the beginning, but eventually he couldn't shoulder the complications of a foreign language anymore- and not to mention, French sounded girly. His mother could at least allow him to take German- it sounded angry and fierce, just how he liked it- but no, according to Carla, French was a language that just opened up doors of opportunity.

Those 'doors of opportunity' were cemented shut now. He had a one-way ticket to failing French- in the form of badmouthing his professor. Professor Levi was known to be rigorous and scarily strict, and because of Jerky Jean and his loud mouth, Eren just knew he wouldn't be able to survive the rest of the semester.

Yeah, he was totally going to fail this class.

Eren's shoulders slumped. "Really, thank you so much, Armin. I mean it."

His friend gently smiled and prodded Eren's shoulder with his finger. "No problem. Eren. Mope later, okay? Your shift starts in fifteen minutes. Maybe we can have dinner after your shift, and maybe discuss your essay? And don't kill Jean, I don't think that would end well for you."

Eren stuck out his lower lip in a firm glower, but reluctantly agreed. "That's fine. My shift ends at seven. But mark my words, Armin, Jean won't go unscathed."

"Right," Armin laughed weakly. "I'm going to pick up some books I put on hold at the library, but I'll meet you outside at seven."

"Milkshake machine, right?" Eren began to strip, carelessly throwing his casual clothes into his employee locker. He began to poke around at the contents of his locker, looking for his employee uniform. It was most likely stuck at the bottom of the messy pile of clothes and books that he never bothered to clean out.

"Yeah, isn't that your area of expertise? The manager hired you just for your milkshakes," Armin jokingly chuckled.

Eren rolled his eyes. When he had applied for a part-time job here, he was given the test of working in the kitchen as well as the counter; while he finished his test with adequate results, the manager seemed to be pleased with the quality of his milkshakes. Of all things- the milkshakes! Eren shook his head, still baffled at how his milkshakes could possibly be different when all he did was add ingredients and crank up the machine.

However, the manager strongly insisted that his milkshakes were utterly delicious, and had a different quality to them that the other employees couldn't produce. Eren tasted his own milkshakes, and to be honest, they tasted completely normal- just like every other fast food or diner. There was nothing mouthwatering or special about it, but evidently the manager disagreed.

"I think Hanji's just off her rockers," Eren blanched at the memory. He didn't know whether he should be pleased that he was hired, or be unhappy that he was hired 'just for his milkshakes'. He would've preferred to be hired for having good customer service or excellent accounting skills, but… not milkshakes. "Have you even tasted them? They taste completely normal!"

"Well, remember when Hanji brought in the store sales statistics last week? The percentage of customer satisfaction has shot up by eight percent, and the amount of customers asking for milkshakes has risen by fifty percent! Fifty! Eren, you are obviously clueless about it, but there's definitely something unique about your milkshakes."

"Maybe it's just dumb luck," Eren savagely pulled on his uniform shirt. Armin handed him his apron, which Eren tossed on and secured with a messy knot at his back.

"If you say so, Eren," Armin shrugged, letting the topic slide. "So seven, at the back?"

"Yeah, yeah," Eren grunted, brushing past his friend to head for the storefront. "I have my shift with Jean today, right?" Eren clenched his jaws together, trying to refrain himself from punching a hole in the wall. All he wanted was to smack the smug smile off of Jean's face, perhaps add in a few blows to his man bits, and then toss in some malicious taunts. Yes, Eren firmly decided, he would do exactly that.

"Ah- no, I think it's Marco today, because Jean, well-"

Eren paused before opening the door. He had to admit he felt somewhat relieved, as he very much-preferred working with the genial Marco Bodt (even if Jean had sneakily convinced Marco into filling in for him- what kind of boyfriend did that, for heavens sakes?!) rather than- as Eren had nicknamed him- _Jerky Jean_. Or _horseface_. Whichever one he felt like using.

But then again… this meant he didn't have the chance to pummel Jean's horsey face right into the ground. _Coward_, Eren thought. Jean probably ran away, hoping that Eren's temper would cool. Eren snarled. He couldn't let the issue just rest; he would corner Jean as soon as he spotted the horseface's ugly face. "He skipped, didn't he? Then he convinced Marco to take his shift? Typical. I'm still going to have my revenge on him though, no matter what."

"Jean's not as bad as you think, Eren-"

Eren scowled and swore loudly, effectively cutting off his friend. "Not as bad as I think, _my arse_. Armin, I can literally think of a thousand reasons why Jean is as bad as I say he is- and yes, we _will _be talking about this later, okay?" Ignoring all protests from Armin, he stalked out of the employee room and into the kitchen with hunched shoulders and a noticeable frown on his face.

Eren despondently plopped himself on the counter next to the milkshake machine, unenthusiastically starting it up and adding in simple ingredients and blending them in less than five minutes.

Jean was the source of all his misery in high school, and Eren had been furious to find out that not only was Jean in many of his college classes, but was also working at the same part-time job Eren had applied to. And now, they shared shifts, which didn't help their terrible relationship at all. Between all the time spent working at the counter, Eren had discovered even _more_ reasons to dislike Jean.

It hadn't been the fault or either of the two, but Eren preferred to think that it was Jean that started the whole 'enemies' fiasco. As Armin had once said, Eren and Jean had two completely different mindsets that didn't get along- as simple as that. Eren grudgingly agreed with that, but he also thought that maybe if Jean wasn't such a dunderhead, then maybe the two could get along better. And today- it was all that bastard Jean's fault.

Marco appeared around the corner, blinking at the sight of Eren, whose glazed eyes were frozen on the milkshake machine while he seemed to be ferociously muttering something under his breath.

"Eren, are you feeling alright?" Marco worriedly asked, hurrying over and gently shaking Eren's shoulders.

Shaken from his reverie, Eren furiously blinked, flustered. "Oh. Yeah, I'm fine, I was just…" Eren paused to grind his teeth. _I was just thinking of a million ways to enact revenge against_ _Jerky Jean, your asshole of a boyfriend_. How did the kind Marco ever end up with Jerky Jean? Eren shuddered as his imagination procured an image of Jean holding roses and whispering sweet words to Marco. _Gross_. " I'm just tired, that's all."

Marco formed an 'o' with his lips, his eyes warm with concern. "If you're tired, maybe you should go back and rest? There's not that many customers today, so I'm sure I can handle them all."

"No, no! I'm fine, perfectly fine!" Eren hastily hopped down from the counter. He couldn't possibly let Marco handle the store on his own, no matter how enticing the idea of going back to his dorms and resting was.

Marco still looked worried. "You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm totally fine! Don't sweat it Marco, I'm just having one of those 'off' days."

"Okay, well… if you feel any worse, tell me, okay? I'm going to the storage to help restock some things- do you think you can handle the cashier station by yourself?"

"Sure thing!" Eren tried to respond as enthusiastically as he could.

He adjusted his nametag, making sure that his name was clearly visible before settling by the cashier counter, a fake smile plastered on his face. His job at Maria's was relatively easy; there were rarely any bad customers that ventured into this small fast food joint (actually, there were rarely any customers at all), so Eren spent most of his time at the cashier counter standing still, daydreaming.

If he wasn't taking orders or prepping the food in the kitchen, it would be:

"Is the two-for-one deal still going on?"

_I'm sorry sir, but it ended a few days ago_, Eren would say. _Perhaps you would like to try our new barbeque chicken sandwiches instead? We have a fine deal for those this week._

"Is there a restroom I can use here?"

Eren would point at the direction of the restroom.

That was basically it. All in all, his job was as easy as it could get. While he preferred a job at the local video game store (where he could play games under the excuse of 'testing' them) or some other interesting place, Eren grudgingly agreed that this fast food joint was a good place to work; now, if the pay was just a bit higher, then maybe Eren could've declared his job Maria's as the ideal part-time job.

When Eren graduated high school, his mother told him that she wanted him to be more independent, and thus, despite Eren's pitiful pleading, cut off all financial support besides school fees. Now, Eren worked part-time for most of the time he didn't have classes, but even so, he rarely made enough to survive. Screw being independent- what Eren worried the most about was his survival. His meals consisted of instant noodles and tap water, and he was just _dying_ for a good meal Working at a fast food joint, surrounded by the mouthwatering aroma of freshly flipped patties and sizzling fries only made his hunger worse- sometimes Eren would catch himself on the brink of drooling. Luckily, Hanji, his manager, was a kind soul (albeit eccentric) and let him take home leftovers on the days he worked.

"One Caesar salad and one small vanilla milkshake."

"Sorry, the milkshakes are all out at the moment, but if you don't mind waiting for a bit, sir-" Eren looked back up, apology etched in his expression. It all fell away into a horrified look of shock when he found himself face to face with-

"P-Professor Levi!"

Eren stifled a gasp. He swallowed nervously, fidgeting as he tried to calm the shivers of panic crawling up his spine. His throat suddenly went dry, and he felt very, very small under the watchful stare of his professor.

"Ah." The older man stared down at Eren's petrified form and gave a small noise of recognition. "The brat who told me to… stuff dicks in my mouth."

Eren ducked his head, mortified, and he quietly mumbled in broken tones, "It was an accident, I swear, sir! It won't happen ever again, I'm so, so sorry, it wasn't directed to you, I was just trying to tell Jean-"

"You were trying to tell Kirchstein to 'stuff his mouth with dicks'," Professor Levi cut him off. "And I suppose you saw the need to _yell_ in the middle of my lecture?"

Eren flushed and clenched his fists. "But Jean started it first, _sir_."

"Yeager, I don't care who started it first, all I care about is the fact that you needed to scream at the top of your lungs and disrupt my lecture," the man said offhandedly, lips curled in displeasure at the small smack of resentment Eren had added at the end of his statement.

Eren visibly deflated. "Yes sir."

"Was that sarcasm I heard?"

"N-no!" Eren gave a small yelp.

Levi looked him up and down, and Eren couldn't help but shiver at the relentless gaze of his professor.

"My order."

"Sorry?" Eren stupidly asked.

"My order," Levi said pointedly, looking Eren as if he had five heads.

"Oh! Um. Yes. Right. One small vanilla milkshake and a Caesar salad, coming right up," Eren awkwardly muttered. "Let me get it for you right now, sir."

Eren slowly turned and awkwardly shuffled to the kitchen, vaguely aware that he was under the scrutiny of his professor. As soon as he walked into to the kitchen and was sure that he couldn't be seen, Eren collapsed into a wobbily heap, leaning on the metallic kitchen counter for support, frantically running his hands through his hair.

In his mind, Eren began to chant a mantra of '_fuck, fuck, fuck_…' with a touch of insanity. He bit his lip in silent frustration. He was going crazy, and he was sure of it when he began to carefully package the salad, making sure that every crouton was placed perfectly an inch apart and that the salad leaves were perfectly leveled. Eren had even taken the liberty of scraping off the unwanted foam on top of the milkshake, and finishing it by cleaning off any extra residue around the milkshake cup. If the situation hadn't been so dire, Eren would've been amazed at the masterpiece of fast food he was serving.

After tucking the food into a paper bag, which he later on transferred onto a tray (wiped clean five times over, then sprayed with anti-bacterial solution), Eren reluctantly trudged back to the counter, where his professor stood, as impeccable as ever. Levi had the same stiff expression, and when Eren was still a few steps away, he quickly searched his professor's face for any signs of impatience or anger, but could only find impassiveness.

Without saying anything, Eren pushed the tray across the counter, not daring to look up at his professor from this distance, lest he be burned by the professor's fixed stare.

"Cat got your tongue?" Levi asked, who appeared peacefully unaware of the boy's inner turmoil. His black eyes stared unwaveringly at Eren's verdant-green eyes, which were constantly flicking back and forth between the floor and the wall.

"I- no- it's just," Eren stammered, searching for something to say. "Why… why here?" Eren winced as soon as he registered what he just said. He didn't dare look up at his professor- the man probably thought he was mentally deficient, if not just utterly stupid.

Levi promptly tilted his head and gently placed his hands on top of Eren's. Eren flinched at the sudden skin contact. The professor's cold fingers pried the boy's fingers loose and slid an unwrinkled five-dollar bill into the brunette's shaking hands. And in a teasing voice, he added, "Yeager, you might want to empty any dicks in your mouth, as it seems that you are incapable of forming any coherent sentences."

Shaking with embarrassment and feeling a horrible, burning shame that threatened to redden his cheeks, Eren snatched the money and hastily shoved the change into the professor's hands, mumbling incoherent words of apology.

Forcing himself to look directly at the sharp chin, elegant nose, and piercing eyes of his professor, he tried again, "Sorry, I was just wondering… why are you here?"

It was a stupid question, and evidently his French professor thought so as well. "Why, Yeager, I was getting myself some food," Levi stated obviously. He finally (finally!) lifted his steadfast stare from Eren, instead turning his attention to the paper bag, observing the salad within. His professor hummed in approval at the contents.

"I was expecting something worse, but I must say, this salad looks better and neater than all the French assignments you ever turned in in my class."

Eren perked up at the beginning of Levi's statement, but quickly slumped his shoulders. That was a low blow- disguising a jab as compliment. Knowing better than to talk back, he stated in a small voice, "Thank you sir." He continued with little enthusiasm, "Thank you for patronage, we hope you come again…" _No, please don't come again, I beg you._

Levi raised an eyebrow, probably detecting the reluctance in Eren's voice. Nonetheless, the professor calmly dropped a single penny into the tip jar.

"Yeager, next Tuesday, I better see you sitting in the front row during my lecture. And you will stay after class as well- I'll let you go for today."

And just like that, he walked away.

Eren stood there for what seemed like an eternity, vainly holding onto the hope that what had just happened was all a dream. He was now thoroughly convinced that this was as bad as his life could get. Even his hunger had disappeared, warded off by dread that pooled in his stomach.

"Eren- Eren, are you alright?"

"Marco," Eren breathed. "I think I'm doomed."


End file.
